again, in a dream.
I had been dreaming about...something, and then I saw him, with a friend. I recognized him from another dream (at least, that's how it felt), or from another time and I wasn't expecting to see him at all. He seemed both glad and surprised to see me, too. He came towards me and then pulled my scarf down, checking my neck. He expressed his disappointment to discover I wasn't wearing the (cross?) necklace I had on before when I first met him (in that other dream, or time, or place). I frowned. Why wasn't I wearing it? Because that was a different dream, a long time ago. Then it felt like I was in the same place, and I remembered he worked as a trail guide. I wasn't attracted to him, but I did find him pleasant, warm, and fun to talk with. I woke up from the dream wanting to find that cross necklace (black and dark brown, made of wood, with a black ribbon instead of a chain, kinda like those usually sold near churches) and wear it again. I haven't "remembered" my dreams with such clarity in a while, so I don't know why my sub/unconscious mind chose to come up with that dream and retain it now. Could be a sign (of what exactly, I don't really know). It sounds silly but hey, I'm Piscean and therefore predisposed to find 'meaning' in dreams and such. Oh well. I'll just have to wait and see, then. i left you a note.
make sure to have your angel read it to you, okay? i will always remember how loudly you purred when i held you close to my heart, where you will always be. In the evening Olenka sat on the steps and heard the music playing and the rockets bursting in the Tivoli; but it no longer aroused any response in her. She looked listlessly into the yard, thought of nothing, wanted nothing, and when night came on, she went to bed and dreamed of nothing but the empty yard. A bird got inside the house and into the kitchen where I was about to have breakfast.
It hopped and flew around, trying to find an exit. The only one was the screen door of the kitchen that leads to the garage, but I couldn't let it stay open without the dogs getting out. So I led the dogs to the living room first and closed the kitchen door. As I was doing that I saw the bird hovering by the screen. Good, I thought, it can see 'the outside' and knows there's a way out there. Dogs secured, I went back to the kitchen. The bird was hopping on the rice cooker. I went to the garage, held out the screen door as widely as possible, and waited for the bird to fly out. And waited. Nothing. Bird? Bi-iiird! I took a peek in the kitchen. No fluttering. No hopping. I must be dreaming, I thought. Maybe I'm still asleep. No, my kitchen sill cat saw it too. Confused, I went back inside, trying to be aware of any swift movement, a small shadow, that would tell me where the bird was. The only thing that happened was the kitchen door opening and one of my grandmothers going in, along with the dogs who were only too happy to resume their places. Just a thought:
"Foreigners" raised in the Philippines can often be more 'Filipino' than Fil-Ams/Fil-Brits/Fil-(insert other nationality) born & raised elsewhere, or raised by their parents without even inculcating in them a sense of "Filipino" culture. ["My mom/dad/grandfather/grandmother is from the Philippines," they would say, but that's about it.] When they hit the news (usually in a good way, for whatever reason) we claim them as "one of our own", share in their success, and sometimes invite them to "come home to the motherland" for some good ol' balut and dancing with the local kids. Sure, bloodlines make them partly 'Filipino' and it's somewhat disappointing that for many people, that's enough. how you do
tit for tat: an expression of thoughtfulness after the fact. Instant film photos taken using my Fuji Instax Mini 10.
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nice to meet mew!Hi, I'm Lauren, and this blog is the repository of my thoughts about erm, mundane things. As you can see, I have a thing for cats. I also like cheese. Archives
October 2016
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